Dear Darla Diaries

never thought I'd say these words

Edit: Had to get up at 3a to pound some more drugs and drinks but overall a hair better than the night previously.

 

Hall's cherry cough drops were one of the best inventions ever! I normally abhor the things and will opt with vitamin C drops if at all possible. Tonight after doses of Sudafed, DayQuil, lemon water, chicken soup and hot tea ... I still needed more. The husband brought me cough drops and cherry light Gatorade. A god among men that one. Between the coating of drink and soothing menthol of drop I may actually get some sleep tonight.

I love that man. He's seen the vomiting, dental work, bronchial nastiness and still
comes back for more. That's true love. The hard work between the happy. What a trooper. (Lets see how he handles his mother sick and his wife on crutches and a cast for 6 weeks at the same time.)

another runonsentence

Also thought of as 'what haven't I been doing the past week.'

Around these parts it's either feast or famine. Husband and I are known for operating at one pace for constant lenghts of time: busy. I tend to try to dial it back on Tuesdays and just about Tuesday only if I'm lucky. He on the other hand can operate like a snake eating it's tail. But in a good, non cannibalistic way, for those who were worried.

I had my first ingrown toenail removed, or rather a sliver of the full nail. Kind of gross and unpleasant but it went about as expected. I was suffering a stomach flu the same day so it was one of those 'smash-my-hand-to-distract-me-from-my-missing-toe' kind of situations except imagine to ghost hands wrapped around my intestines and crocheting them into a doily against my will. So. Much. Fun.

Speaking of doilies the MIL is still twisted up. We hope to discover the severity of her current intestinal stricture after a procedure on Wednesday. Lucky for us she's used to functioning through pain but she's shedding weight like a snake's summer skin with her current liquid diet. Soup, broth, liquid supplement and repeat.

Between her and I, from mid-April through mid-June, we have 13 consecutive weeks of doctor appointments and procedures scheduled around work. That leaves very little free time, far too much time spent at the hospital I work and play at, and a few minutes left for the cat.

I have snuck back onto the WoWtrain a bit. I went between 6 and 8 months with very little gaming and this past week have squeezed in my evenings farming, killing and grinding. If you play you get it. Essentially the same thing all you Farmville, FBing, Twitterstalking, Piinterestedaddicted, solitaire playing fools do. Distracting myself with a little digital distraction.

The diet is also going well, if I can randomly change topics. I could wax on about a bridge between the last paragrah and this, but I won't. After 3 weeks of morning workouts, cutting out the processed crap, fresh and green foods and even the occasional restaurant I'm down 10 lbs and quite a few inches. My goal is another 30 in the same slow steady consistent pace. I wouldn't mind fast, but it won't stay off. I've recently been busting my own chops about my history with weight loss/gain since I hit Germany and it's not doing me any good. (185 upon arrival, dropped to 168 for the first time in years on a strict no sodium/lowest fat diet, gained 22 lbs back in the 23 days we went stateside, gained another 15 lbs between than and husbands returned from deployment and capped at 207 - thank you doctor's scale.) I'm highly aware than 10 pounds in 3 weeks is good weight loss, I just have a goal of 155-165 in mind and want to be healthy and not obsess about it.

Damn the flying monkeys for hiding the vodka. Mommy just wants a sip! I'm sure it's calorie free ... 

 

P.S. I've more food tips that I've discovered in the building of flavor profiles and decreasing the calories, carbs, fat and sodium to post! Sadly, not today. I just like to tease.

more of a funny than a blog post really

Also known as 'Funnies I Stole From Facebook' in lieu of a full post because they made me laugh ...

whatnot and such

I'm going to tell you all a little secret. Hubby did me a surprise for the twinday and arranged a weekend trip to nearby Speyer.

What's awesome is that I'm not inviting you too rob me since Mah and fatboykitty will still be home. I wouldn't be so concerned with Mah but that kitty is a ninja.

I, of course, decided it made sense to travel all injured and whatnot. Well that may be a bit of an exaggeration. My PCP thought I needed to get my TDAP vaccine since whooping cough is on the rise she says. I second guesssed myself and thought it made sense to get it yesterday afternoon instead of after the weekend. I have a massage booked for Monday and I didn't want to feel like crap on top of that. So instead I've been running a low grade fever and my shoulder, elbow, wrist and fingers have been aching like a son-of-a-gun. Lucky for me the hubby is beyond distracted with worth and he isn't paying my mistake any never mind.

(Anyone got a cure for my toddler whininess? Cause I really like doing it but I don't think it is very well received. )

For the trip, I am so beyond excited because the hotel is in the middle of the historical district and within walking distance of this ginormous cathedral and a technik musuem that has an IMAX. Technik = planes, tranes and automobiles and I am super dupery duper excited. Warning, I am quite the geek at heart.

I will call the big one Bob and the others Mary, Joe and Curly. They will be all mine. Mine! nom nom nom

So a toursting we will go. And it will be a blast. Because I said so.

 

where did all the toilet paper go

It is with fond farewell that we send our last temporary roomie on his way. The past 6 weeks our door seems to just have been swinging on the hinges as our home was temporarily turned into a hostel. First our good friends who received a very short notice on exiting the Army as well as Germany, followed by a friend missionary needing an overnight stay or two and lastly a good dear friend of ours for the past two-ish weeks while he finished up his moving stuff to head stateside.

We are most definitely sad to see them all go, but L's was an irony. We met him and his wife when we visited their home two years ago while house hunting. They were vacating off post housing for on, and we needed an abode. Voila a friendship was formed. Not only did he stay at our house, which was his old house, but he did so in his son's old bedroom. So with sadness another set of great friends are being separated due to the nature of this military business. [Shin kick Awesome Job in the balls. Hand Awesome Job icepack and bourbon to nurture it back to an amicable mood.]

Between having extra bodies in the house, chasing moving friends and vacation friends and new church functions, as well as a sudden and startling influx of work [read: injured soldiers to shop for that are seemingly coming out of the hospital bedpans], it has been a whirlwind of nonsesne around these parts. I glance at my computer but a haze of lethargic blues kind of blotches it out. Great Big Blog Ideas pop into my head at inoportune moments like nearing REM status or driving to work or fighting in the shower with the cat and I don't think to write them down. By the time it comes around to blog I just sit watching the blinking cursor with a blank mind and a sigh. I knew I needed to teach the cat to talk. No I don't think it's odd to fight with him in the shower, he would prefer I move so he can lick the floor and not wait until I have rinsed the suds from my eyes. He also thinks I'll budge on the No You Can't Go Outside rule. Duh. I also don't let him run with scissors, play his music after midnight or feed the basement mice. They get enough scraps from the neighbors.

I digress.

It has just been busy.

The hubby and I had a huge Moment a few weeks ago. Not a Divorce or Separating Moment but I huge epiphany and some heartache and some huge communication issues and some friend's help. It was chased with a big dose of humility, compassion and the relief that only with God's love and our desire to strive through the Love War and Madness that is our marriage has it has survived to this degree. And did it and does it live another day. [No, I don't judge those that have experienced the devastating effects of divorce and no, I don't think that marriage is easy in any way, shape or form.] I wanted to blog it so bad. I wanted to share the expression that is the tumbling cacophonic explosion that is our relationship to each other and God and all of it. However I waited to long and it has dissolved back into the sleeping beast that is the calm between the storms.

I am currently still wading through This Awesome Unfiltered Memoir. My Kindle has so many highlight notes that it could burst. Jenny Lawson's raw unfiltered mouth and sarcasticly droll wit is refreshing and inspiring to my dark sense of humor.

And that's it. That's all I've got for today. Adieu.

I heard Wonka was trolling Piinterest. It must be true. I found it in Google.

 

 

foiled by the web tool

My daytime computer has been foiling my attempts at a long satisfying vital vomit ! Pardon me while I whoop it. This is why I go Mac.

it's called a Traffic Jam

Stuck in traffic while exiting base - oh joy
I really need to stop procrastinating and finish my women's study homework and write out my testimony for Tuesday and Wednesday
Oh look my future car!
This better me an amber alert or nuclear fallout
Yea 60 min to finish work get home and prep for party - ambitious much
Twins face is so skinny
I'm so lazy - if she can do it and eat tons what's my excuse
Oh that's right - lazy
What if I were pregnant? With twins? With twin puppies? Mom would get it
Shameless is utterly shameless and I am soo addicted
If cars are coming in why have we parked for 25 min?
Cross another thing off the bucket list
Speaking of lip service
At least it stopped raining
Ew the calves of my jeans are soaked
I really could use some deodorant
I wonder if it would be quicker to walk
Seriously . Dead child.
Facts can't be morbid
Battleship rocked. I must google the story behind the retirees and ww vet - they rocked
Dududuhhhh
Yes iPhone I did spell that incorrectly
This notepad app rocks. Thank you semi functional iPhone4
How serious can it be if all those cars are coming into base and we can't leave?
Great now I'm thinking in circles
Hungry now and way too over caffeinated
Pie would be awesome
Where's a mobile pie vendor when you need it
30 minutes. Seriously. I don't see aliens or transformers or fire.
Hmm 34 min ... I wonder how much trouble I could get in for photographing all the passing cars
I'm so glad this is on the clock
40 min. Ahhhhh. I wonder if the car battery can outlast the phone battery
I totally blame the militant alien barbarians
Horse and buggy? Walkie talkies? Loudspeaker? Useful gate police with any indication on when life can resume?
Wow, enough time to proofread this post and spellcheck
Engines are starting! Do they see something I don't?
2,917 seconds and counting - thank you Mr Calculator
False alarm - back to deathly silence on the parked thoroughfare
*wonders why more cars don't jump the short curb and turn around
*remembers not a rule breaker and doesn't have enough clearance
*kicks self in shins*
Oh look passengers have trekked the .75 mile walk to gate and back again
And I'm blogging in 3rd person
Time frame for that party is dwindling ... Seriously want to be a drinker tonight.
Ti Kcuf ... Ya you heard me
My husband says I have a potty mouth. What does a potty mouth look like exActly?
19:50, 19:51, 19:52 ... Someone needs a whooping
It's hard to run out of words when stuck in traffic for nearly an hour
63 min and I finally moved 6 car lengths. Progress
oh look - stuck again
Frack me

drowning my sorrow in y.utub.e

I know these 'Things People Say' videos have gone viral and overdone on an epic basis but these were a little too funny too pass up ... and let's face it the hang over hurts way less when alcohol isn't involved.

(1) Because c'mon ... we all know it's true. Faceb00kers meet the Tw#tterf#t

 

(2)Not neccessarily true? ... Although anyone who's seen or heard of Portlandia seems to think that everyone from Portland Oregon, (also known as the state I was born and raised in) acts like this ...

  

 (3) Epicly True. Oh and this is EXACTLY what I he says when I'm he's playing. Husband aggro!

 

5 more minutes ...

melancholy-much

Baby sister summed up the measure of my feelings the last week or so in a recent email to me and Twin.

Alright, my lovelies! Supposedly according to Twin we can have a 3-way video chat on Google+. Your assignment: set yourself up a Google+ account (it's easy, just go to the top right side of your screen in Gmail and there's a + button), and then tell us when a good time is to talk in the next week. I miss my sisters, dammit, and I'd like to actually talk to both of you at once for a change. Make. It. Happen.
PS - I'm free Tuesday morning (until about 1:30p, then I have to go to class; that's 8:30p D-time and 11:30a Twin time), and Weds after about 2p (noon for Twin, 9p for D). Thursday I'm open after about 1p. I'm available in the morning on Saturday.

Love you's guys!!!!
- Magoo


No seriously, stop dicking around reading your email and get yourself set the crap up on Google+!!!!

She cracks me up because (a) I am on Google+ and (b) normally I'm the one who gets to boss Twin around.

The husband had to see the glorious evidence of my state of mind Saturday night. After a delicous, exhilerating and somewhat exhausting game of scramble I started crying. (Please make a note, I rarely cry. I'm like the angsty teen that when her heart is being ripped out of her chest she wants to bawl but her tears have abandoned her and she is left with the stoic aloof face. Be assured I am generally a mess on the inside.) He was little baffled like wha-? How did we go from That! to that!! Well I'm a girl and our brains are erratic and noodly and I don't possess the 'Thinking of Nothing' box to hide in!

It's just a culmination of many things. I asked him to reassure me that somehow, sometime the whole adopt/broken ovaries/barren womb thing would sort itself into a parenting situation. Husband's opinion always trumps the misguided but kindhearted platitudes that often meet my deaf ears. It's not intentional they are just beyond over cliched at times.

I told him that Magoo and I were more than a little jealous and homesick because we are both 1/2 way around the world from our kin. And although we are blessed with cool and loving 'local' friends and inlaws - they aren't our kin. They don't understand us from the skinned knees, puberty, heartbroken stages of our youth to present. Nights of signing and whispering in the dark so our parents wouldn't catch us. Softball in the yard. Having hours upon hours of lawn mowing competitions. First husbands, deaths of family, births of the youth.

Another friend is PCSing. It seemed like I lost a part of my soul when I had to leave the closest friend I had met in my adult life at the last base, and the military in turn has taken her family to Oki. Now the 2nd closest friend I have met is moving to the states tomorrow while we will still be in the Germany for the next 2years. I want to clone myself and mail my bits to Oki, Maryland, Illinois, Oregon and leave a golden bit for Husband's pocket ... but alas it's not his fault the government doesn't share well with others.

So the funk I am in. I'm sure it will die down soon. In the mean time I will use Twin's face as a goal that eventually I too can lose 40+ pounds and look skinny cute like 11+ years ago when we were married. If not my dart arm will be so ripped that the hubby will be jealous.

feed him much?

Let's play a little catch up shall we?
The husband has been back from deployment nearly 60 days. I have happily returned to a state of spoiled and satiated, and not just in the bedroom. After being together over a decade that should be a given. My cook, foot massager and fellow couch surfer is back. The man who finishes my sentences and knows all the sitcom inside jokes. It really is the little things.
His mother is in the states on a 7-week hiatus. She calls it 'grandma time.' I figure by week 3 we will be too comfy in unrestricted naked time in the shared rooms of the house and she will be crying on the inside missing her room, bed and limitless WoW. I hope they don't kick her out of the guild. She practically is the Oracle in game. I am merely a palace jester, but at least I can firmly say I am no n00b.
I do miss her companionship. She is a permanent fixture around her. I understand her anxiety and she understands my ADD passive aggressive introverted tendencies. Like bookends we be. In a way two woman can be and a man just can't quite grasp. It's an estrogen thing.
I am waayy overdue in registering for a German language class, getting 2/3 cars repaired and anything related to adoption. Yes those are all unrelated topics. I also need to write our Germany-Euro bucket list, firmly declutter (without reboxing) the storage and organize my yarn. But who's really keeping track? Let's not even start on my shoe collection or clothes stashed under the bed ...
I've begun baking again. The bourbon banana bread is practically a weekly staple and I am taking my hand up at knitting again. My crochet wrist calls me a traitor and than curls itself back into a carpal tunnel fit. It will soon get with the program. I am dabbling in a new hobby, not dropping an old. Unlike the keyboard, my yarn never stays dusty for long.
I am also trying to remember why I've loved to blog for so long. Dooce mentions it in a recent post. Loving the chronicle of life. Letting it flow. Here's looking at that, and the fat bastard of a pet watching me blog.