Dear Darla Diaries

blue ball

Sometimes inspiration can come from the simplest of things.

flower coaster cozies

Scrap cotton washcloth yarn. Approximately $1.25 per skein.
Each flower is 4 rows of stitching.
I whipped up a set of four in about two hours.
These are approximately 4 inches from petal to petal.

hooking in the gaps

This is my work in progress of a Privacy Wrap from the CrochetMe collection.

shut up and sing

I'm taking a tip from Sarah after reading her "live blogging Rambo" bit and than instantly having an opinion after the first five minutes of the 2006 Shut Up And Sing Dixie Chicks documentary.

We live in a country full of freedom of speech and yet they had to stone the All American Girls because of a joke. A jesting comment made in the spur of the moment. A slip of the tongue when the filter isn't even connected between brain and vocal chord.

Dixie Chicks " Shut Up and Sing" live blog

- Wow, this situation was blown completely out of control.

- Lead singer Marnie from Dixie Chicks made a flippant comment "we're ashamed the President is from Texas" in jest and turned into a huge career halting catastrophe.

- This is incredible because if any non-country singer in the mainstream stood up against the war or if you listen to 60% of the gross comic humor on comedy central or 85% of American cable television after 12:30a you'll see millions of people be so far MORE unpatriotic.

- I just scrolled the Dixie Chicks and it's mind blowing to see the lack of traffic. They are still the most talented female group in country music history ranked with Garth Brooks, Shania Twain, Hank Williams and Elvis Presley. How ridiculous.

- The Dixie Chicks unlike other phenomenal groups like Black Eyed Peas, N'Sync, Matchbox 20 and No Doubt, don't have break out singles from the lead singer going her own separate ways. They've kept as a group. (Not to speak ill of the talented Fergie, Justin Timberlake, Rob Thomas or Gwen Stefani who are all very talented in their own rights.)

- I remember when the outrage happened. I remember seeing the news feeds of the overly patriotic, (is there such a thing?) how about ZEALOUS (is witch hunt folk going too far?) , people blacklisting them from radio, their homes and especially their hearts. They couldn't have got a better reaction if they would've branded I HATE JESUS across their chest.

- I love this Entertainment Weekly cover they did. I think I actually still have a copy of it in my old magazine from weird art project pile in my library room.

- Cool LHAB fact, at least two of the girls had severe fertility struggles and had to get into IVF treatments to get pregnant. It was cool to see them with slightly puffy and imperfect cheeks and discussing the horrible cycles. To see them so real!

- I remember when the first song went huge. I had just fallen in love when them and found out they were a playing a free concert in my home town while I was states away in college. I was more than a little jealous of my twin for getting to see it that day.

- Would it sound sappy if I said seeing their children doesn't make me giggle?

- Ridiculous is some of the facist remarks to them about death, murder and unpatriotic. It's absolutely ridiculous. They have one of the biggest hate boycotts in history. A country music announcer actually said Marilyn Manson would get less hate on the country station then them. Really? I have absolutely horrible opinions on them.

- One of their producers said they give Tracy Lawrence the "wife beater" another chance shouldn't they give it to the Chicks?

- Did I mention the entire incident was a giggle laughing comment to a packed crowd in London on the eve of the war that is still going on to this day?

- This news bite is from the a Guardian reporter that helped spawn the whole cycle.

In a reversal of fortunes that even the Teflon-coated Kate Moss would have found hard to pull off, the Dixie Chicks are the biggest band in the world. Last night they won five Grammy awards, including the non-country and much-coveted album and song of the year trophies and no-one's happier about it than me. Because, four years ago, I almost destroyed the yee-haw-ing trio's career.

Remember Natalie Maines' infamous comment: "Just so you know, we're ashamed the President of the United States is from Texas"? Though I didn't put the words in the baby Dolly Parton's mouth on March 11 2003 at Shepherd's Bush Empire, London, I repeated them in my review of the gig for the Guardian.

- Oooh, big irony. Toby Keith slurred Natalie Maines in his concert in regards to the whole situation yet he has been personally nearly blacklisted from numerous country award shows. Than of course the whole Maines-Keith  playground spat held on the front lines of the media, but that's a whole other blog.

- OK, so I'm getting a little off the track. I love both Toby and the Dixie Chicks separately but this whole situation is blown madly out of proportion.

- I almost forget I think my parents (love you Mommy and Daddy but don't have to agree with you on everything) were furious when this uproar blew up. I'm pretty sure that they were even up in arms with my sisters and eye for supporting them through this conflict.

- I think the reality is that only the ignorant would take an innocent comment that was made as a joke and turn it into "support the Chicks and support Terrorism and be a Traitor."

- OK, OK, OK so one last thing, maybe. Mr. D came home. And I brought up the subject and man it blew up. In his defense he didn't like them from the git-go which changes my entire rant but in the end the same thing happened with the Dixie Chicks that happens with other controversial celebrities like Chris Rock, Carlos Mencia, Kathy Lee, Britney Spears, Madonna, Pamela Anderson and TomKat. You get new fans and for once instead of being golden children you face daily controversy for standing up for yourselves. I may like them and he may not, but this is a free country and I believe in freedom of speech and differing opinions. (Oh and trust me, from on military wife to the world, I LOVE my country and am very patriotic and I don't feel less so for loving them.)

- Yee Haw Dixie Chicks. From one girl who's known from stupid slip of the tongue comments to another: you deserve to be forgiven. You don't deserve to feel like you're being physically nailed to a cross and whipped for your actions. (But if you watch BET you'll see a few videos of that too. From superstars. With fantastic talent. Who aren't boycotted.)

just get over it

To the driver of the 1995 lime green Tercel with Idaho plates driving down Hwy 2 this morning:

Please don’t drive 15 miles under the posted speed limits during the 6:30a commute, especially in the fast line while impeding the ever stretching line of automobiles behind you.

No one appreciates your need for safety that is, in fact, impairing traffic.

I do believe that is considered an oxymoron.

Get over it or take the bus.

 

To the driver of the 2008 gold Sebring convertible with Washington plates also driving down Hwy 2 this morning:

Please stop riding my butt so close that you become one with my exhaust pipe while I’m trying to keep at least a half car length behind the Tercel driver.
The line of cars on my right and guard rail on my left prevent me from moving out of your way.

Next time you decide not to heed my warning when I gently tap my brakes in alarm because I have lost sight of your hood and windshield, which are under my ass, you might get a surprise. That surprise will be me climbing out of my car and thumping you upside your damn fool head. No one appreciates a car wreck they are trying to avoid.

Get over it. Seriously, get over it.

 

To my semi-petulant reproductive organs:

I’m going to skip the pleasantries, but so are you, so it shouldn’t be an issue.

Next time you decide to go on boycott and forget to tell the rest of the body, we do hope you would reconsider. The rest of the body doesn’t really appreciate when you don’t bring your A game. They are currently feeling abused enough with the new fitness regime and healthy foods, your abandonment just brings out the hatred and resentment and sulking.

No one likes the sulking. It’s kind of embarrassing.

Please get over it.

 

To the scheduler of the base softball league:

I love to watch my husband play league sports and activities.

I take pride in watching the former football/wrestler pound it out of the park again and again.

I, along with the other spouses and children and scorekeepers and umps, do not, however, appreciate your skills.

The original schedule with two games per week, and each being double headers, didn’t seem too complicated. The rotation of either 5 and 6p or 7 and 8p games is also fair, so that the same teams don’t constantly get screwed with the early shift with the heat or the evening shift and the bugs.

Then you started to get it messy. At first it was an adjusted schedule of 3 games a week and now, for some reason it’s 4. Seriously now, that’s a whopping 8 plus hours a week at softball on top of work and stuff.

Not to complain, even if I am good at whining, you might be out of your damn mind.

I’m just saying what everyone else is probably thinking.

Just get over it.

what to do

 

So what do you do when you find out your sister-in-law and husband are trying just as desperately as you to get pregnant but yet your revolting body isn't manning up? Do you instantly feel anger and resentment and harbor bitterness? No, you paste on a happy face and hope and pray she won't get lucky first, because though she's a year older you've been trying for so much longer dammit.

[I think I'll stick my fingers in my ears and sing na-na-na-na-na--na. If I don't look at it, it can't exist.]

So what do you do when you find out your SIL's BFF aka Mr. D's "other" sister is 8 weeks preggers via her MySpace page? Do you jump up and down? Do you pick up your PowerBook and charge to the bathroom and screech at the bathing Mr. D? Do you scream OMG do you KNOW who's pregnant? And you DIDN'T tell me? Honey I am ALWAYS the clause when someone tells you not to tell anyone something. Of course I wouldn't be resentful. If it was your sister I'd just throw myself off the nearest bridge, no resentment. No I'm not planning on wearing a parachute.

P.S. Just cause the SIL's a hooker doesn't mean I won't whip out some goodies for them both.

P.P.S. Yes, I am capable of hooking for people that I might be "irritated" with.

P.P.P.S. Yes, I know it's not the babies fault and of course I wouldn't resent the little peanut, it's just a lifetime of sibling rivalry that just won't die.

P.P.P.P.P (omg) S. Congrats to Lossandra and good luck Aarion!

P.P. blah blah blah S. Seriously, I'm very happy for them both ::sigh::

clomid 100 mg: take one

So as Susan and Sarah so kindly reminded me, it’s the pregnancy test that brings AF, irregardless of D28, D38 or D48. This week that does seem to be true.

Today is D6 and the first day of the stronger Clomid dosage. It should be interesting to see if any side effects manifest themselves, I can never seem to tell these days if it’s all the new little meds or just me being me when my inner bitch emerges.

Next week is my next apt with Mjr. Arm. I hope she either finally has some clearer diagnostics and some answers or we get the referral to the specialist. I want to have a little more of an educated guess of what the next steps will be, besides my google and fellow infertility blog advice. Self diagnosing isn’t always terrible, except for when it involves hormones, ovulating and possible high risk or improbable pregnancy options.

I’ll keep you posted.
xoxo
Darla

inked up kin

My second cousin Skip, who's always been more like a kid brother to me, recently returned from a tour in the big sandy for his dad's funeral. As we were hugging, mugging and tearing I noticed some ink peaking out from the edge of a shirt sleeve.

darla got perm

day 49: the monthly headgame

Day 49. (And by Day 49 I mean cycle day and not day of the month. I no longer think of time as July 1, 2008 but as Cycle Day 5: start Clomid. CD9: make babies. CD21: draw blood.)

I don’t even want to bother getting excited when I get the monthly pint drawn from my arm for testing.

So many would be giddy and excited, but if the HPT’s are any example I doubt the blood test will embrace me warmly.

At bedtime I try to smother the urge to run my hand over my barren womb, false hopes are such a bitch.

Morning dawns overcast.  Thunder storms on the forecast.

Nine hours until I’ll have to call the clinic and see if that little vial has been tested.

Surprise, the doctor’s office called me in record time, and by record time I mean when they opened. That’s never a good sign.

Naturally, in true Darla style it’s a big fat NEGATIVE.

Did the doctor tell you the Clomid would make you late?

No, but it does seem to be progressively stretching my last three cycles farther and farther and farther apart..

Ok, so let’s go ahead and schedule you to see the doctor, as I’m seeing noted in your chart.

Oh, you mean for the appointment to discuss my 100mg Clomid, that I haven’t taken yet, because my cycle hasn’t started? Or the 21 day blood work review that was supposed to follow that Clomid and show my progesterone levels, which I also haven’t had drawn yet?

I’ll be there with bells on.

I can’t stop focusing on the bottom low P-levels.

If they really are as low as I thought I first heard that means they’re nonexistent. The more I read the more I realize how virtually impossible getting pregnant might become.

Thanks for playing P-levels. Can ya’ll bring your A game next time?

P.S. D49 may have become D1.

P.P.S. That doesn't make things any easier. I'll have to skip like three months of cycles at the rate I'm doing before I realize I may actually be preggers.