We asked and she delightfully and speedily contributed. Guest post by
Mia. Thanks Mia! xoxo Darla
Ahhh
the joys of Halawa (body sugaring) not only can you remove your excess
body hair but you can eat the left over’s too; it’s a win-win situation
if you ask me! Body sugaring is done by making a paste of sugar, water,
and lemon juice that has been heated to the softball candy stage. It’s
a cheap homemade alternative to waxing (or shaving) and a lot less
irritating too. Body sugaring diminishes hair growth rapidly. Usually
it will take from 4-6 weeks for hair to grow back, depending on the
person and the type of hair. Plus the more you do it the finer your
hair tends to grow back. The hair on my body is barely noticeable now
and I no longer have a unibrow.
Before
I school you on the stuff let me tell you something about myself. I
chose to reveal what follows simply to back up my experience in the
world of hair removal. I’m not just the president I’m a client too! I
come from a clan of hairy people. Back in the days when man was
learning to walk erect my ancestors back in Spain measured sexiness and
desirability by the amount of hair on their prospective mates bodies.
The hairier the body the more warmth they were able to provide their
mates with while snuggled up in their caves on the Canary Islands
during cold nights. Judging by the way they procreated with a vengeance
my ancestors were very hairy and very desirable sexy mofo’s.
Unfortunately as they continued to evolve my father’s branch of the
family failed to turn off their hairy gene resulting in some hairy ass
descendants, specifically my father.
The year was 1981
when my father first bedded my mother. My mother a lovely woman of
Spaniard and Arab decent had smooth hairless skin. Although my dad was
amazed by this he never thought to ask about the why of it. He just
assumed she had alopecia on her arms, legs and neither region. My
mother however was not prepared for my father. My father a very
handsome blonde man with green eyes had mesmerized my mother with his
physical beauty however when she got her first eyeful of him naked she
almost ran for the hills. It was not the size of his “package” that
struck fear in her virginal heart instead it was the amount of body
hair he possessed that scared her. “What the hell are you?” she
yelled “Are you part big foot?” The man basically popped out of the
womb with a razor in one hand and a can of Barbasol in the other. Lust
being what it is his hairiness did not stop them from getting in on. A
year later I the first of three hairy children was born. This is where
my expertise comes in.
